by Katherine Shears and C. S. Whitehurst
Just for kicks, have you ever wondered what your parents really want from you in life? Is it you, or do your parents want you to have no real fun? On any given day, do you want to make your parents proud of you and still do what makes you feel really happy within yourself? Of course, you do! But the real question has always been, and still is…how? How can we actually get this done?
Well, with A-C-T like a Kid and T-H-I-N-K like a Parent, a.k.a "the child-part consoler", you will get past common misunderstandings by learning how to truly talk, hear, and listen to your parents, guardians or caregivers instead of feeling like you have to run to friends to find some sense of acceptance, understanding, and real connection.
In this book, chock-full of questions and answers gotten directly from the source, you’ll learn what your parents, guardians or caregivers really expect of you—and maybe you’ll even find out how to explain to them what you really expect from them! Not that this book could ever replace a parent, because it can not. But when it comes to openly communicating certain key ideas, this book comes really close.
This tell-all guide contains lots of enlightening explanations and helpful answers to many common kid questions like:
What do my parents really want from me?
Why do my parents do what they do and say what they say?
What do I really need to know about my parents' parenting skills?
How can I keep my parents happy with me?
How can I help my parents to help me?
How can I get what I want from my parents every time?
A-C-T like a Kid and T-H-I-N-K like a Parent is an intro to the secret knowledge of adults which is a set of informations that is mainly covered in the book entitled Surrogate Re-Parenting: A.K.A. Get Your Mind Right, and even more thoroughly covered in the book The Secret Knowledge Of Adults. While this book, A-C-T like a Kid and T-H-I-N-K like a Parent is intended for kids 10 and up, the info in this book is beneficial and useful to the intelligent kid parts in all of us. Yes, this means you too.
The information in this book will help you and yours to start to see your parents, not as the enemy, but as the caring human beings they really are, and take the first step toward family unity, understanding, growth, success, and happiness! Both you and your parents really deserve this, and with this book, A-C-T like a Kid and T-H-I-N-K like a Parent, you and your parents can actually achieve this.
Karen A. on Amazon wrote:
Do you struggle to stay on good terms with your parents? Do you get into trouble even when you have done exactly what has been asked of you? Guess what? It is not that you did what was asked of you but how you did it. Do you often think your parents do not like you? Would you like a few days of being genuinely cordial with your parents? How nice would life be if you never got the old, “I’ll think about it”? That almost always leads to a ‘no’, right? Would you like to learn how to talk, hear and listen to your parents without ending up in a shouting match that just ruins everyone’s mood?
Katherine Shears and C. S. Whitehurst give insight into the expectations from both sides of the aisle. This book teaches children how to communicate their own expectations. They also learn the why of their parents’ actions and words. This book teaches them to be proper children now so that they can be proper parents and adults in the future. From this book, they will also learn how to talk to their parents in a way that gets them exactly what they want every time, without all the whining and manipulation.
Parenting is a daunting task. No book can possibly prepare anyone for parenting. There are surprises every day. Books will always give insight into what parenting might be like but they are very general guidelines and not in any way specific to a child. For the most part, parenting is just trial and error until something works. Only one thing is common in parenting, the visceral need to protect. Parents will protect their children from harm by all means. Sometimes they will be protecting the child from themselves. At this point, the children will often clash with their parent. The parents become, ‘no fun at all’ or ‘ruiner of life’. ‘Act like a Kid, Think like a Parent’ opens a portal to what parents really think of their children. With this book, children will no longer look at their parents as enemies but as caring and loving humans with their best interests at heart.
Act like a Kid, Think like a Parent has been written for the 10 and up crowd. It is at this stage that parent-child relationships start getting strained. The tone of the book is friendly and conversational. The book is written in simple language, which is appealing on the target audience. It is a well-written account of parental expectations in an authoritative but still friendly voice.
The attention span of a ten-year-old child is very short. They might drop this book before getting to the most important parts. The book could do well with more breaks in the middle and maybe giving real-world stories to illustrate the points. The tone of writing also gets a little condescending in some parts. However, these do not take away from the important subject of this book. It is an important tool for cohesive parent-child relationships.
C.S. Whitehurst and Katherine Shears have written a book geared towards the young teenager called Act Like a Kid, Think Like a Parent. While it is written for a kid’s perspective, it has valuable information for parents and those thinking of becoming parents as well. This book is divided into eight main parts with a conclusion as part nine. The authors cover topics such as why parents do the things they do, why do they act the way they do, how to keep your parents happy, how to have your parents help you, winning with your parents, and questions you have always wanted to ask but haven’t. The tone of the book is kept light in most places, just trying to provide information in a way that a young teen would comprehend and not get bored. It is a cross between a self-help and a step by step guide to navigating a child / parent relationship.
One of the key points this book makes in the beginning is that parents need to learn how to be parents. They either learn from their parents and peers, or they take classes, read books, or get therapy to help them navigate the challenges of being a parent. I personally find the attitude that parents that don’t go to therapy and take classes are reckless. There are different methods for learning parenting and sometimes no matter how many classes you take or therapy sessions you go to, you can’t cover everything you will ever encounter. Aside from that at the beginning of the book, the rest is filled with great information. The authors bring up a lot of great points on how to deal with the day to day relationships of kids and parents. I love how they broke down most of the chapters into easy to digest bites, covering a very focused topic in a couple pages. This is great for the younger reader, and since the table of contents is very detailed kids can flip through and not have to read the book cover to cover if they don’t want to.
This book is a great resource to read with your kids. I think some of the areas depending on age might be too much for the preteen kids, but still valuable if their parent is reading with them and can stop and explain things. The section I found most valuable was the questions kids always wanted answers to. Even as an adult I remember asking those same questions to myself growing up and would have loved someone to give me answers like this so I know I am not alone or crazy for thinking them. I also like how the authors don’t try and push all the responsibility of maintaining the relationship in one direction or another. They discuss things kids need to do to keep their part of the relationship up like chores, good hygiene, being honest and open about their feelings. They also explain that parents need time to process, to develop trust in their kids, and that parents are humans too with feelings. That even if their kids have a higher IQ than them in some areas, parents have wisdom from years of living that they bring to the table and should not be taken for granted or ignored. A great mix of information for kids and parents.
About the Authors...
Katherine Shears is a graduate of Strayer University and an executive consultant who is dedicated to bettering the social function and overall visibility of all she encounters. She is a deep thinker with an open mind who stays on the cutting edge of learning, having read over one hundred self-help titles and counting.
C. S. Whitehurst is a psychology-based UX/UI designer/tester, computer programmer, IT project manager, and self-help enthusiast who is a student of science, philosophy, life, and NYU. As a native of New York, having been exposed to social diversity, he has been coached by life to respond to the issues plaguing inner-city youth.